Sunday, June 29, 2008

Great Scott!!

Dear Past Me,
STC- September 28, 2007- 6:41pm

Don’t rip this letter up. It’s not a hoax. What I am about to tell you will come as a shock, but if you bear with me for a few moments, you will understand what’s going on. I am your future self. To be precise I am writing to you on July 1, 2008. Due to the oil boom in the Middle East, the Arabs have quickly moved up the technology food chain. It ‘s pretty impressive when you consider what a lot of oil money can accomplish. I am not going to get into the details as I don’t understand much about how the process works, but the jist of it is pretty simple…we can travel through time. Problem is so far the only thing we can send is letters to our past selves.

Impressive huh?

We don’t even have a mail system in UAE that will allow us to send letters from one Emirate to the next, but we can send letters through space-time. You can thank Sheik Mohamed and what you will later discover was an aptly named Dubai lifestyle magazine called Time Out Dubai that was a front for this super secret project. I think the goal was to figure out how to build buildings faster, and being the visionary that he is Sheik Mohamed decided to invest in a time travel project so that the Dubai government could retroactively correct any delays or design issues.
Anyway, enough about the science, I’m sure you have many questions. So…where to begin:
I know this may come as a shock to you…especially if you are reading this where I think you might be reading this….but you are now living in the desert. To be specific- Dubai. I can’t tell you what you do or who you are going to meet or what’s going to happen with your life (names like rocko, Achilles, and Kman may come into the fold-I’m being serious). Sorry, space-time is a monopoly and it’s not democratically run. (but it’s still pretty cool)

What I can tell you is that you were right about the markets. I know you know that already, but I just felt it might make you feel a little better as I know the September/October rally is killing you. (yes it runs into October) But as things stand today the credit crunch is still going on, and inflation is accelerating. Some advice for you- crox, lvs, sigma, bsc, mbia, and har will implode as you predicted…just not when….hope you can take this hint. As for rimm, stay out of its way it will do nothing but frustrate you. Don’t try and play both sides. Also, stick to your longs…oxy, btu, and gld are gems… can’t lose. Try and be a little more patient with your source of capital….you guys have the right idea…just not the best formula….work on it. Oh, btw, Cramer will be wrong on everything, and so will everybody on Fast Money. And the sell side is about to pull a 2000 repeat with respect to how off their price targets on stocks will be.

As for everything else, the family wedding will go off without a hitch. Yes, I know it seems like I am lying, but I am not. Sadly, you may miss a few of your best friends’ weddings, but as far as I can tell, they don’t hold it against you. A couple of your friends are about to have kids, so get ready to start feeling old. Btw your significant other will move to Paris in like 60 days. I know you don’t believe me, but its going to happen. Oh, your Law Professor will take at least another 2 months to submit your grade so keep on him or he will forget and you won't graduate.
It will be the year of Boston in professional sports, Obama will defeat Hillary, and Lebanon will plunge in and out of chaos. As for film, stay away from anything M Night makes from now and on, and also don’t watch the new Indy…just pretend like it all ended with the Last Crusade. Oh and I almost forgot….you won’t believe who dies on Lost…it’s *********(if you don’t see the name its because Abc has signed a deal with Dubai Holding and is probably in the process of protecting all its intellectual property throughout space/time)

Your friend in Time,
Dubaican(you'll get this eventually)

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